And, As I was Saying
- - - - by YMedad
This morning, Minister of Public Thought Matan Vilnai, together with
Minister of Public Secuirty Gideon Ezra and Minister of Justice Tzipi
Livni declared the color orange to be an enemy combatant. As such, it
is subject to immediate arrest and adminstrative detention (without
trial) as a significant public security risk.
Orange appealed to the Supreme Court, but Chief Justice Barak quickly
ruled that declarations by the Minister of Public Thought could no
longer be thought about (except by the Justices), and therefore
Orange not only had no standing to raise the issue but was in
violation of the law by doing so. Orange quickly departed from the
court.
All citizens (at least Jewish ones) found to be wearing the color
Orange will be considered in violation of thought rulings and subject
to arrest, interrigation and administrative detention, unless they
are part of evening wear for those living in the upscale sections of
Tel Aviv.
Jaffa orange growers also brought an appeal to the Supreme Court,
declaring their livelihood at risk by the ruling. However, Justice
Elyakim Rubinstein declared them idiotim gamurim (complete idiots),
as in Hebrew the color orange and the fruit orange aren't the same
word. He made sure they understood that Katom (the color) should be
avoided while Tapuz (the fruit) should be consumed. The orange
growers left, though their trucks were seen unloading a year's supply
to to the court dining room.
company, quickly announced that they were renaming themselves Chevrat
Adom (Red), in honor of the government's excellent new policy.
Further, internal research showed that the naming of the company
Orange had been a anti-anti-zionist plot.
Prime Minister Sharon was questioned by the media about the ruling,
and whether the public could protest it. He reminded the reporters
that Israel is a democracy and the public is free to protest any
matter they wish, as long as they don't think any thoughts that have
been ruled inappropriate public thoughts, associated with them in any
way (such as wearing or using them), or congregate in groups greater
than 10 in public.
One might think that the story above is a parody, but it's not...